(Photo Credit: Screenshot via The Frisky)
That's what NYU grad Chanel Carroll did. Based on Beyonce's "Partition," Carroll's version includes lyrics like: "Sallie Mae pay off my tuition, please! Can't you see I'm begging you here on my knees?"
There are some heart-tugging moments to offset the cheesy-on-purpose visuals of the Titanic going down ("Now I'm doing under, trying not to drown") and Bill Cosby ("No, Daddy, Daddy, he didn't help at all. Oh, baby, baby, this girl is on her own.")
If you went to college and the shot of Sallie Mae's name popping up on her phone while Carroll's at work doesn't give you chills, well, you're lucky. Seriously, even if you're among the 65 percent of loan-takers who have never been delinquent, the Call From Sallie Mae ranks right up there with Naked in Math Class in terms of the all-time worst nightmares a person can have.
You can see the whole thing, embedded below. Just heed the words of Slate's Aisha Harris:
"...[P]roduction values are not high, what do you expect? She probably can't afford anything newer than Windows 98, what with all those loans."
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