First things first: obviously, you shouldn’t actually troll the hiring manager at your next job interview. Probably, you don’t even need me to tell you that: why waste your precious time and risk alienating a potential contact, just for a joke? (Unless you have a hidden-camera prank show. In which case, I suppose it counts as career development.)
But the fact is that job interviewing is stressful, and some interview questions veer toward the ridiculous. Unless you have superhuman levels of restraint, you’ve probably imagined giving a less-than-professional answer or two. You wouldn’t really … but it’s fun to think about.
In that vein, a recent Reddit thread provides a lot of entertainment (if no actual usable career advice). I-am-willow asked:
These are some of the best answers:
1. The Secret Shopper
Make them think that you are a secret shopper, there to evaluate them on their ability to conduct an interview.
Make them think they are doing a bad job.
You: “Hmmm, so were you going to ask me about my weaknesses?”
Interviewer: “Uh, sure that was going to be a little later in-”
You: “Later? Oh wow… OK… ” *scribbling notes* – Ganglebot
2. Good Question
As a teen, I went to an interview at a fast food place, ’cause my parents made me. I didn’t want the job. The interviewer asked me why I wanted to work there. I leaned back, put my hands together, and said, “Good question.” But I didn’t answer the question. I just let the awkward silence fill the air until the interviewer nervously asked the next question. – sarcasmo_the_clown
3. Everyone Loves GOT, Right?
Respond to every question like a Faceless Man from Game of Thrones. “A Man would like the job, a Man has bills to pay. A Man would also be a useful asset to the company, if the company is willing to give A Man a chance.” – Irishwoman94
4. Don’t Hit Yourself
Repeat the last word of every sentence that comes out of their mouth.
It’s as annoying as it is entertaining.
Entertaining. – myownman
5. Nervous About Background Checks
6. Nailing Down That Sick Time
“How many sick days taken per month would you consider to be understandable?” – PrideandTentacles
“Can I carry over my unused sick days?” – TiberiusIX
“Is 31 sick days per month okay? I have a very weak immune system.” – _prima_donna_
7. Courtesy of the Three Stooges
Ask repeatedly if there will be a background check. (Getting more nervous every time.) - littleredhoodlumClick To Tweet
“Come in, take a seat.”
*leaves interview with a chair* – Tea_For_Me_Please123
8. Not Much More Confusing Than Most Corporate-Speak, TBH
Speaking only in metaphors and hyperbole the entire interview, but none of the metaphors make any sense.
Example: ” What can you do for this company? ”
“You see, this company is like a storm, and I am the fencepost.” – -spoon-
9. Take That, Big-Deal Tech Employer
“Give them a pen and tell them to sell it to you. Make sure to have a long list of technical-spec questions prepared.” – TheSpanishImpostion
“Then tell them that they don’t qualify for the job. Ask them to send in the next person.” – Iforgotsomething897
10. My Expected Salary Is One-MILLION Dollars
I had an interview over Skype once. About 10 minutes into the interview, I really didn’t like the way things were going, so I decided to just ride out the remainder as politely as I could.
About five minutes later, my cat decided to jump onto my lap, so that his head and body were visible to the interviewers. Rather than move the cat, I leaned back and started petting him.
[I could tell that] the interviewers felt this wasn’t really appropriate, but to turn it up another notch, I leaned forward, grabbed the half-filled glass of wine that had been on my desk since the night before and took a sip.
I tried my best to look like a super-villain with cat and wine. They wrapped up the interview fairly promptly and I finished my wine.
Didn’t even get a call back. – JingJingfromQQ
Posts have been lightly edited for style and clarity.
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