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Talk Like a Pirate Day: 5 Modern Pirate Jobs

Arr, mateys! It be Talk Like a Pirate Day, the best nonsense holiday in the history of nonsense holidays. (Sorry, Everything You Do Is Right Day. You had a good run.)
talk like a pirate day
fuzzcat/Flickr

If you’re spending the day cutting out paper parrots to wear to your afternoon meeting and tormenting your coworkers with your Jack Sparrow impression, you’re probably already aware that there are no streamlined paths to modern piratehood (meaning, of course, the cinematic version with the fun hats). But there are some jobs that have a certain swashbuckling flair.

Chart a course for these careers, and you’ll be recruiting mateys on LinkedIn in no time:

1. Hedge Fund Manager

Want to count your gold? This job might be for you. Median annual pay hovers around $103,000 according to PayScale data, but the big earners make serious bank: The New York Times reports that the top 25 hedge fund managers in 2016 had a combined net worth of $11 billion. Yes, that’s billion, with a B.

The top 25 hedge fund managers in 2016 had a combined net worth of $11 billion. Click To Tweet

2. Ship Captain

Want to steer your own ship, literally and metaphorically? Ship captains are responsible for everything that happens on their vessel. The bigger the ship, the more people you command, so managerial skills are especially important in this role. Ship captains work in commercial freight, passenger transport and recreation. This job pays a median annual salary of $92,268, according to our data.

3. Lifeguard

Save your mateys! Lifeguards don’t make a fortune — median hourly pay is about $9 an hour, per PayScale data — but they do get to help people, rescuing swimmers and administering first aid, as well as creating a safe swimming experience for all. Plus, you can’t beat the office environment.

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4. Fishing and Hunting Guide

Pirates gotta eat, and fishing and hunting guides show landlubbers how to haul in the day’s catch. Guides earn a median annual salary of $36,107, and must be good teachers and cool under pressure. (The great outdoors comes with risks, as well as beauty.)

5. Animal Trainer

Your pet parrot isn’t going to learn how to sass your rivals and do fun tricks all on his own. Animal trainers teach our furry, scaly and feathered friends how to obey commands, perform tricks and help people. Median hourly pay is $11.48, according to PayScale data.

Tell Us What You Think

What job would you add to this list? We want to hear from you. Share your thoughts in the comments or join the conversation on Twitter.

Jen Hubley Luckwaldt
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